Photography and Life

I have slowly collected an impressive set of pictures, not of the most gorgeous cars or the rarest but the ones, I found unique in one way or another. (This beautiful corvette from the 60s still rocking it fuel injected platform, it owner however was total tool) And sense car nut I wanted to share them with the world. (This is one was the Christian concert that when too, love me some VW transported vans) In other news, I stop bleeding human blood and starting bleeding money. I spend over a thousand dollars paying bills. Continue reading Photography and Life

Pictures of You

Hello, I have always been camera shy, maybe it the fact not what you called goodlooking or even slightly alright. But I have been ever afraid sense my last two surgeries of losing my memories. The fever, like fervent fire consume so much of them, and with no pictures…all that is forever lost. And you see dear reader, I wanted to immortalize the moments. I know another surgery loom over in the future. So now getting photocrazy and taking pictures of absolutely everything, obviously I’m still not the best and incredibly shy about it. And the sort of guy who can … Continue reading Pictures of You

Silver Screen

Hello folks. Here something I been wanting to do for ages: Watch films. And that is another part of depression, usually I like to watch films with others, but felt like my life choice everyone was saying: Oh don’t watch that, or you watch that? My gosh what wrong with you! So with that in mind, I felt like my choices were terrible, watching alone in my house felt, sort of stupid and without meaning. And that when I discover, I have to feel happy about my own things, at my own time and by myself. Learn to love one … Continue reading Silver Screen

Ye Good ole Telly

You ever scan the crowd for them? Those who like you? The faces in the rain, the addicts behind the curtains. You star the night off with two beers, no matter how much you wash your hands the fucking smell of carburetor cleaner and break fluids just won’t leave. You drink your first beer while making that shrimp soup. Twice you glance down, your hands and what you see is your hands are still dirty from the grease, caked under your nails, black as tar. You sit down on the oak table, and start your second beer. The shrimp soup … Continue reading Ye Good ole Telly

To anyone that got an ear!

And here is another day Have you ever found yourself taking a taxi back home and telling the driver everything about your life? Or perhaps the passenger sitting next to in that long train ride with nothing but snow outside. And how about that cashier, bank-teller and even that girl you just recently meet at the pub. You talking to anyone and everything, because your alone. Because you wanted that stuff out off you. To be heard, to be told and even question. Dammit, man my life matter and important! You shout like some crazy person behind the bars inside … Continue reading To anyone that got an ear!

Father Time

Hello It been tremendous amount of time sense my last post. It’s all do to a combination of mental breakdown (that arose as response to year of apathy and depression) and lack of money, which force me to work overtime, and in holidays. I worked Christmas, New Year’s Eve and New Year. And you think I would had been incredibly sad to have spend those days work instead that with my family. But… Actually, no I was quite happy. It jut happen that in those days before the coming new year, I saw that my inner desperation, the need to run … Continue reading Father Time

Crystal Ball

Yo Sorry I took so long folks, I been without internet and without a car & medical bills! But incredibly enough somehow the hospital called me and wanted me to do another sort of study, this one regarding possible Sleep Apnea, to be honest I feel incredibly lethargic through the day and hard to keep awake but heck. I can’t do another bill in my pocket, yes health important. But stress creates damage in health which is cure by taking time off work, oh you know the circle already! I’m however trying to relax and not worry about the million of debts … Continue reading Crystal Ball

Vortex of Lunacy

Oh man, feel like my life slipping into some enormous hole. A very good friend of mine drag me after seeing my miserable self and told me, I must go to a specialist to seek help. I was afraid of the mindset I recently had, I wanted to seriously go to this specialist. The meeting was wonderful and very personal, yet when I was there I didn’t feel it. I didn’t feel much because of the apathy at that moment. So here I was with this psychologist and he told me, I was seeing life “black & white” as I’m currently … Continue reading Vortex of Lunacy

God’s lonely man

Boy, going through one those amazingly powerful apathy. One which makes all activities as dull as butter knife, even coming here and typing this seem to provoke a “what the point?” sort of dilemma. Yet, I wish to continue and push forward yet even that seem to require all my energy. PS: Have you ever gone through some enormous apathy? Continue reading God’s lonely man

The Horizon

Hello, I’m finally back to work, slowly I’m accommodating to what was once natural. As reach for the letters in the mail, it more bills, some urging that I should pay before the amount doubles, others than we yet to receive money. In week pass, I would tither and fall into pit of anxiety. Now it different, I place the bills next to a now large collecting pile, well I ever get out this hole? The taught was serious a week ago, now it mist. Like everything inside me, it just state of numbness. My mind crossing a cloud land … Continue reading The Horizon